do you accept or resist the present moment?

Well, it is what it is.’

When you hear such a statement, it may lead you to believe that this is your acceptance of the present moment and of what is happening at any given time.

However, so often we say this without really accepting this present moment or situation. Often, we resist the present moment by judging and defending certain actions and opinions related to the moment.

How often do we just say we accept the present moment and how often do we truly, authentically and consciously accept the present moment around us?

How can you be more accepting and less resistant of the present moment in your life?

What does Acceptance mean?
We all know the moments in life when all is ‘right’ in the world or perhaps just our world. This is most certainly our own individual perspective of that particular moment and it is our perspective that all is ‘right’ in this moment as we would like it to be.

When it comes to personal change, we mean something different with acceptance. Acceptance is allowing what is happening in this moment to happen, regardless if this moment is what we want, what we need, or what we think we need or desire to be.

Simply be what it is. Even if in this moment not is all ‘right’ in the world, acceptance still happens. Acceptance of the present, acceptance of what is without judgment and without resistance.

The present moment is all we have. However good or bad a situation is, it will always change.

The acceptance or resistance of this moment directly influences the next moment of our lives. And the next. And the next. Until these moments turn into our hours, days, weeks, months and years of our life. It all comes back to how am I accepting or resisting the present moment in my life. And what are the consequences or benefits of this choice.

What does Acceptance look like?
When we choose acceptance of the present moment of our lives, we live in a state which can represent such behaviors and emotions such as:

• Joy
• Gratitude
• Peace
• Content
• Calm
• Loss of time (no past and no future – only now)
• Silence
• Awareness of the life force of breath and breathing
• Love
• Trust (of myself, of others, of nature, of what is)
• A quiet mind
• Confidence
• Freedom
• Productivity
• Focus
• Knowledge (knowing you are exactly where you are meant to be doing what you should be doing for that moment)
  

Reflection & Application

1. Can you think of a time in your life when you were fully accepting of the present moment? What type of moment was it?
2. How are you accepting the present moment in your life right now?
3. How can you increase this acceptance of the present moment in your life?
4. How accepting are you of the present moments in others lives? Can you see the value it letting it be for yourself as well as letting others be?
   

‘Do what you can, where you are, with what you have!’ – Teddy Roosevelt

What does Resistance mean?
Often times we resist the present moment due to an overwhelming emotion of FEAR.
But what is it we are fearful of? We resist what is often times because acceptance would force us to change and transform in numerous ways we may or may not be prepared to do.

Change and transformation can be perceived as threatening, scary and unnecessary for many. As such, resisting the present moment ‘works’ for many as it protects us from having to make such changes.

Resistance means fighting what is true or inevitable and working to change what currently exists or what is happening. It is un-acceptance. We imagine the way in which we wish it should, could or must be. We judge what I, as it is not what we should, could or wanted to have. We act as if we are in complete control of the moment and are then frustrated when this moment does not give us what our thoughts have told us we think we are deserving of.

Just as accepting the present moment is hard work, resisting is just as much, if not more. However, we may not see that this manner as resistance of the present moment has become second nature to us over time as a way to cope and manage with the numerous changes in our lives.

If the fear no longer existed, would we no longer resist and accept? Often times, yes. Once when we become aware of and understand what we are resisting and the fear behind this resisting, our acceptance of the present moment becomes more of a tangible option.

For many, it is still hard work to stay in acceptance of the present moment and something we must be reminded of moment by moment. The more acceptance of the moment, the more benefits we gain and the more motivated we are to accept and stay within this present moment instead of shifting back to resistance.

What does Resistance look like?
When we choose resistance of the present moment of our lives, we live in a state which can represent such behaviors and emotions such as:

• Fear
• Anger
• Stress
• Doubt
• Unnecessary chatter
• Confusion
• Insecurity
• Hate
• Lack of awareness
• Selfishness

Life is most certainly not fair. Whoever said it would be? But we can make it easier by accepting the present instead of resisting.

Understanding Resistance and the Fear – And letting it Go!
An important part of the transition process from resistance to acceptance of the present moment lies in identifying the reasons why we resist and fear the present. Why do we fear what is happening to us at this exact moment? Consider the following:

1. What happens if you accept the present moment as it is?
2. What happens if you resist the present moment as it is?
3. What is the worst thing that could happen if you accept the present moment as is?
4. What is the fear behind your resistance of the present moment?
5. Is this fear real? How do you know that?
   
6. Does this fear come from the present moment? Your past? Your future? (Which, by the way, do not exist, as this moment is all we have.)
   
7. Reminder: The present moment is all we have. However good or bad a situation is, it will always change.
8. What is the advantage in accepting the present moment as it is?