Nothing is wrong with you. You are human.

And you're having a human experience, with lots of human experiences where perhaps we are not happy, we feel hurt, surprised, disappointed, relieved, stressed, joyful... all of these feelings that go along with being human.

While I think it can be sometimes be helpful to raise awareness of why someone does something, as you perhaps  are doing right now, but more importantly look at what, if anything, do you want to do about it? Or can you just be with the feeling and let it pass as it always does and always will?

So often we feel that we have to 'do' something with everything we are feeling and experiencing . We tell ourselves, we have to 'do' this or that, our cultures tell us to 'do' this as those who 'do' are rewarded...... We feel if the questions arise, we must find an answer and do something to answer the question. This is how our brain works:  identify a problem, do something and solve it. Our brain is wired to find meaning. But we can change what this meaning should be.

I have challenged myself with just being with thoughts, emotions, doubts and questions so often over the last few months. I most certainly still have lots of feelings, but I am becoming more comfortable with letting them just be there. And then I let them let go. And let them come and go.

We are human beings. Not human doings.
What would happen if we changed the question from :
What do I need to do?
to
How do I need to be?

Active Listening allows you and other individuals to engage in a dialogue where you are both equipped with clarity and understanding of the purpose, content & outcome of the discussion.

It is an empowering and important skill in managing differences in an intercultural environment.

1. Look at the individual, stop the other things you are doing and remove distractions.
2. Listen not only to the words, but pay attention to the tone and emotions of the individual.
3. Be attentive to what the individual is talking about.
4. Restate what the person said in your own words to ensure complete understanding.
5. Be patient.
6. Respect the silence needed.
7. Respect the pauses and let the individual finish speaking.
8. Ask meaningful and clarifying questions.
9. Be aware of your own emotions and opinions.
10. If you wish to offer your own opinion, only do this after you have listened.

Global teams may have a common language, most often a form of English, but is there a common culture? as well within the team? Often times, no. 

And moreover, there is not a common context from which understanding comes and decisions are made. 

This can lead to confusion, frustration, duplication, trust, resentment, turnover and low engagement.

Can a common language lead to a common culture and eventually a common context?
What does it take?

We can help you figure out what your common culture is and how to work with it.

Giving and receiving feedback doesn’t need to be a stress filled experience. Receiving feedback from another person is beneficial, with the intent of enabling you to grow as an individual and to help you be successful.

Giving feedback is a way to let people know how effective they are in what they are trying to accomplish, or how their actions may have affected you. If we know how other people see us, we can overcome problems in how we communicate and interact with them.

Giving Feedback

1. Convey your positive intent
2. Describe specifically what you have observed
3. State the impact of the behavior or action
4. Ask the other person to respond
5. Focus the discussion on solutions
   

Receiving Feedback

1. Focus on the content, not on the person
   
2. Listen calmly and attentively
3. Clarify the feedback
4. Acknowledge the other person’s concerns
5. Avoid defending or over-explaining